Uptight Liberals Have Found A Way To Ruin Your Favorite Old Movie

March 25, 2025 3:00 pm

One day, you’ll try to watch a classic (and harmless) movie on a streaming service, but, first, you’ll have to sit through the following disclaimer:

“Hi. I’m Dr. Juanita Sloan, dean of the Gender Studies and Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Department at the University of California, Berkeley. The movie you’re about to see is a product of its time and is incompatible with contemporary standards,” says the woman, who clearly has an agenda and wants to make you uncomfortable.

“The movie contains several subtle microaggressions as well as subtexts that are clearly racist, misogynistic, homophobic, and transphobic. That is why our streaming service has made the stunning — yet brave — decision to alter and/or edit the offending scenes and/or dialogues.”

Terrific.

I can think of a number of films from the latter half of the 20^th century that are probably susceptible to this kind of disclaimer, even movies that were rated PG.

Yesterday, I wrote about watching the Gene Hackman movie Hoosiers. I later found contemporary reviews that blasted it as “racist” merely because it took place in rural Indiana in the 1950s and had too many white characters. Modern critics also have a problem with it because it portrayed Hackman’s character, a coach, as “an unassailable authority figure.”

I suppose coaches are bad now too.

Right now, nerds who collect movies are debating amongst themselves about their home video collections. The discussion concerns whether it’s better to buy a hard copy of a movie or just save space and buy it on a streaming service.

If you’ve been to a Best Buy lately, you’ll realize that the store no longer sells physical copies of movies. People instead purchase movies on streaming services such as Amazon, Flixster, or Apple TV.

The nerds, however, are unsure whether they can trust the streaming services not to alter and/or censor a film that might, in the future, fall out of line with the left’s “contemporary standards.” Even if the movie is unedited, these nerds certainly don’t want to sit through a disclaimer where some egghead lectures them about what bad people they supposedly are for trying to watch one of their favorite films.

MAX has added its own disclaimer to the start of Gone With The Wind. The estate of James Bond novelist Ian Fleming says it will alter future editions of his books to meet contemporary mores. As for the older Bond films, I predict the stuff with Sean Connery and Roger Moore will get the same treatment.

Even children are subject to this nonsense, as old Tom and Jerry cartoons now come with a racism warning.

I currently have a copy of Blazing Saddles on a streaming service. I suppose, as a precaution, I better buy a hard copy.

Special thanks to Warhammer’s Wife for proofreading this story before publication to make certain there were no misspellings, grammatical errors or other embarrassing mistakes and/or typos. Follow Warhammer on X @Real_Warhammer. Read Warhammer’s stories on The Hayride by clicking here.